Michael: Forced Into Breaking a Bad Habit

The heat radiates

Enveloping my body

As if I were loved.

 Tuesday, March 24, 2020



Right before the CV hit, I had already committed to cutting back on my post workout ritual of consuming a vending machine candy bar and substituting a post workout drink mix from Men’s Science. I was about one workout into that routine when we shutdown.



At that point I hadn’t considered that the CV would effect my usual routine of snagging a coffee and Danish after my bike rides, but on Sunday, regardless of whether I could snag a take out from Starbucks or Vintage Grocery, I thought that would be kind of a thoughtless indulgence of me to just go into a store and break the social isolation mandate for needless calories.



So perhaps this continuing CV cleanse will allow me to continue upgrading my diet by breaking my habit of after bike ride caffeine and chocolate infusion. We’ll see how long this last and when it’s over whether I’ll be able, in my weakened post exercise state, to refrain from walking away from my bike into the aromatic magnetic draw of one of the truly overlooked benefits of riding – the post ride warmth of black gold and deep brown heaven.

Michael: Three Deep Breaths

Three Deep Breaths



Small, small headache;

A bit of an itchy nose.

Is it… Was it…

Where is it going?

I can’t afford to find out.

Michael: : Lent is Over

The Hummingbird Sage

Blossoms magenta and pink

Early in the spring.

Sunday, March 22, 2020



Since Christmas I’ve imposed a moratorium on buying anything new that wasn’t food. I spend plenty of money on myself and as a savings experiment, I thought it would be interesting to see what a three month layoff would do for my savings.



I broke down and ended this financial isolationism a week ahead of schedule; and this was only indirectly related to this virus outbreak.



Initially I was going to get my sister a nice birthday present (March 29) then go on a bit of a shopping splurge purchasing shoes, shirts, shorts and whatever else struck my fancy.



 But because I’ve been laid off work it wouldn’t be very smart to shed a good chunk of my savings that way.



For the most part I’ve got more than enough to be comfortable doing what I’ve always done. But because I no longer have access to the treadmill (at work) I was using for speedwork, I’ve been puzzling how best to maintain that part of my workout regimen.



When we lived in Panama I ran on the airport runway and used the countdown timer on my inexpensive Timex Ironman watch to do sprints. I really enjoyed that workout. The runway was always empty and being basically a small private plane runway in the middle of a small farming community, it was in the middle of lush greenery as opposed to streets and concrete like the tracks I use to run on in the states.



Fortunately, we now live in Topanga just outside the State Park where there is also an pretty isolated stretch of straight pavement.



But unfortunately, my old Timex died and my current watch doesn’t have an audible countdown timer, hence the sigh of relief when yesterday I purchased another Timex at Runningwarehouse. I also bought an inexpensive tank top as a de-stressor and inhibitor from what will be a delayed and more austere buying party when all this craziness comes to an end and we can get back to the more mundane and harmless craziness of competing again.

Michael: Mud and Stones

Seems as good as time as any to start writing poetry again.

Mud and Stones



There is so much I could see coming

And not see coming.



The dark skies

Dazzle

And hold me …



Still…



The sun and shadows move

Until the world goes gray.



And there I was

And wasn’t.



Tears, rain, mud and stones.

Rain, rain, mud and stones.



Mud and stones.

Michael: A Quasi Ambassador

Tears, rain, mud and stones;

There is so much I could see

And not see coming. 

 Sunday, March 22, 2020



When I broke my nearly three month spending blockade on Saturday, I also edged toward breaking my exclusive relationship with Ultraspire hydration products.



I say edged toward because even though I bought another company’s pack; it’s just slightly out of the capacity range of Ultraspire. I bought a Montane Razor 15 from Enwild for $80. The largest pack Ultraspire makes is 14 liters.



When I signed up to be an ambassador I promised to only use Ultraspire hydration packs. And they do make great packs for a very wide range of applications. And Even if I wasn’t getting 50% off, they’d still be worth considering for anything but multi-day fastpack or hiking trips.



But even if the purchase of the Montane doesn’t technically count, sooner or later I will more than likely purchase another brand’s product. Not because Ultraspire’s packs are falling behind. I just feel at this stage of the game I’m going to try to be very choosey about buying any pack and when I do I’m going to purchase the best pack that suits my needs. That may be Ultraspire; it may not.



 Of course costs is always a factor, and it’s hard to walk away from 50% off very good and competitive products. But I just don’t feel I need the ego strokes of being an ambassador.



Also, I agreed to Facebook about my races, and I’m not really much of a Facebook person. I haven’t friended anybody or posted any pictures. Outside of a few comments to others and noting my results I’ve pretty much stayed away from it. I guess I’m just old in that regard and would rather just keep in contact with people I know.



Signing up really was more about my ego than about Ultraspire. But I do really enjoy their products and won’t shy away from them in the future.  

Michael: Corona Cleanse

 Coyotes howl

Before their shadows appear

And they start to move.

 Saturday, March 21, 2020



Yesterday was suppose to be my last day at work but that was cancelled due to the governor’s orders to close up shop. But what’s taken away with one hand turned out to be a fortunate swipe for the other as that allowed us to get to the stores a bit early and to our surprise Target had toilet paper. So we should be sitting pretty in that regard for the foreseeable future.



And speaking of out shopping…We’ve been in the Armageddon quandary of whether to live it up and buy all the old junk food we’ve been fighting to curb back on, or use this as an opportunity to further clean up our act and strengthen our immune system by buying and eating cleaner. After our initial splurge of chocolate, ice cream and other snacks, we’ve decided to try and stick to our old compromise of limited snacks on Sun/Mon then otherwise go clean.



And while rededicating ours to cleaning up, since we may be isolating for a while and spending most of our time at home, this also seems like a good opportunity to clean up some of the other loose ends of my life. Like since going back to work full time I’ve gotten very lazy about Spanish, music, art, poetry, chess and just about everything else except exercise that use to mean so much to me. It seems overwhelming to try and jump back into those all at once, but scheduling small bite sized time clusters for those interests seems reasonable given all the free time available now.



So today is the day to organize and make a schedule that I’ll stick to while still recognizing that I do enjoy large chunks of time just to meander where my lazy mind takes me.

Michael: Jump Start

The silver linings

Behind these ominous clouds

Are disappearing. 

 Thursday, March 19, 2020



Within a little over a two term presidential span we are facing our second huge economic crises requiring massive government intervention to save the economy. It appears that in both cases what will be done will be enough to jump start this older, harder to keep running jalopy, down the road until the next crises comes our way and we’re asked once again to “all” sacrifice, get behind our old beloved Family wagon and push even harder this time round.



With the elections coming whoever’s going to be driving us next are not going to make the fundamental changes required. Neither Trump nor Biden will. The only reason to vote for either is the Supreme court. I lean left so I’ll vote for Biden. But I don’t see that as fundamentally different than voting for any other Democrat other than Bernie or perhaps Warren. That’s not happening so…



So unless we all, and by all I mean the vast majority of Americans who are continually being asked to get behind this ever demanding old vehicle to get out and push, stop and say the hell with it. It’s time we find a new vehicle that’ll work for all of us. We’re going to be asked to keep pushing until we’re “all” abandoned on the shoulder of our highway with our thumbs out while the wealthy get Ubered the hell away from us poor desperate crazy people.

Michael: Whimsy Vs Agency

 

Twenty four hours

And the world’s turned upside down

Coughing and wheezing.

 Wednesday, March 11, 2020



The song of my childhood was The Ant Song about an ant that could do impossible things by setting it’s mind to it. As an elementary teacher I often heard my fellow teachers give this same refrain to their students year after year; you can do or be whatever you choose if you set your mind to it.



I was always skeptical of this attitude. Not that I wanted to throw cold water on any of my students’ ambitions, I just thought it was irresponsible to paint such a simplistic and rosy picture of life. Again, not that I wanted to bog down six year olds in a morose existential slouch, nor deter them from enjoying their dreams of becoming a professional athlete or entertainer, but why not just suggest to them that if they enjoy basketball or singing to just enjoy it without attaching such grandiose ambitions to it that they can become the next Koby if they only set their minds to it?



Life is crazy and whimsical as we’re all being starkly reminded of right now. We can try our best. Be our best. But that isn’t going to guarantee us much. That isn’t to say we should just give up or indulge in a solipsistic fantasy world for all of our lives.



I just think it’s far more worthwhile for us to respect all of our limitations, including our own, and admit that there are circumstances, many beyond our control, that affect so much of all of our lives. I believe that frees all of us to try our best and enjoy what lives at the center of what makes living such a pleasure without the added burden of believing that not becoming a Super hero has to do with any character flaw we should be ashamed we couldn’t overcome.

Michael: The Placebo

Pinwheel sky of clouds

Dissipate under the sun

Without a good-bye. 

 Friday, March 6, 2020



I don’t smoke or drink. I do drink a couple of cups of coffee every morning. Don’t see anything wrong with that. I also, however, eat a lot of chocolate and sugar and that I would like to curtail.



I’m hoping I can substitute a placebo, at least in the place of most of my immediate post workout indulgences, by drinking a glass of Men’s Science post workout recovery formula in place of the usual vending machine chocolate bar.



I figure if I can create that habit it’s a quadruple win. I’ll get the boost of whatever, if any, benefits the drink gives me. I’ll get the placebo effect of believing I’m doing something positive. I’ll get the bonus of less sugar. And, along with that, perhaps inch closer to losing some body fat.



It’s worth a try.

Michael: The Failure

Let sleeping dogs lie.

What else are you going to do with them

As the days heat up?

 Tuesday, March 3, 2020



On Saturday I ran 40 miles. I was suppose to run for 60. That’s what I signed up for. That goes in the books as a DNF. In this case though that’s getting off lightly. A DNF should be reserved for injuries or some other intervening circumstance that prevents continuing. What I did is an AQ – Actively Quit.



I was only able to focus for 6 ½ hours. Very disappointing, though I’m not going to dwell on that for long or plot out any redemption race anytime soon. I’m going to shift gears and focus on shorter race goals.



In the months ahead I plan on running under 20 minutes in a road 5k, a 5:30 road mile and a 1:25 half marathon. That’s going to involve a few tweaks to my training plan with more emphasis on speed work.



To that affect I’m going to start doing SIT workouts on the Woodway treadmill at work twice a week while also continuing my regular once a week speedwork.



When I was growing up there was a goofy T.V. show called the 6 Million Dollar Man. His credo was, “faster, stronger, better.” I’m trying not to be “slower, weaker, older.” I couldn’t get it done last Saturday, but I can’t pout about that for long. Unfortunately, unlike Steve Austin, I don’t have the healthcare coverage to help out with the upgrades done to him. I’ve got to do it the old fashioned grandpa Seinfeld trainer way. Not pretty but hopefully not completely comical either.