Undulates
across the room
Like
it owns the place.
Friday, May 29, 2020
Since
people have been cooped up for a bit we expected that when the trails opened up
again we’d see a few new faces on the local trail. But to our surprise, on one
of our very first dog walking outings we caught a peak at a bit more than the
faces of a few non-locals.
Now
I’m solidly in the upper end of the middle aged spectrum but I still don’t
consider myself a prude. If you want to go at it in nature, whether because
you’ve been inside for months, or you just love the feel of fresh air and
mosquitos on your privates that’s fine by me. But let’s all follow a few simple
rules of proper birds and bees etiquette out there.
One,
unless you’re an exhibitionist and are willing to expose yourself to criminal
penalties (pun intended), find a reclusive spot off a named public trail. That
bridge, with it’s trickle of water flowing underneath, may seem like a tranquil
scene to gaze at while you’re going to town (again, pun intended), but it’s a
very public walkway, even during the week and particularly after dawn. There
are many more preferable locations, though I’ll confess that in SoCal water
features will become harder to come by (all right; last pun intended).
Two,
after location, timing. During the week, particularly Tues-Thurs, is going to
give you a greater possibility of privacy.
And
three. Make it an event. Scout it out and prepare so you’re both comfortable.
That time and effort acts like foreplay and should raise the enjoyment of the
experience.
These
are simple guidelines that would seem pretty commonsensical, but apparently some
newbies to the outdoor sensual delights world are pretty clueless.
So
enjoy, but keep the trails clear so that people and their dogs aren’t requiring
you to pull your tights up and run off like deers caught in our headlamps.
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